Saturday, January 21, 2017

Journal Entry# 18: Pray I will run to You...

Abba, You have prefect knowledge of men. You know me better than anyone. You know my thoughts, struggles, secrets, hurts and fears. You know it all. Nothing is hidden from You. I pray that with this knowledge, that I will run to You. I will run to You when things are good and when things are bad. You are amazing God. 
                                                                                                                                    11/8/2010


Our God is all knowing. During the year of 2010, I was struggling with a lot and I would try to keep things to myself. I was struggling with my identify and had fears about the future. But I take comfort in knowing that I do not need to keep things I am struggling with to myself. It is so important that we as Christians, run to Him about everything. God knows it anyway. We all need to trust in Him. He does care about the things that concerns us. 



Scriptures

 Psalm 62:8 
          Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.

     Psalm 139:1-4
O Lord, you have examined my heart
    and know everything about me.
You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home
You know everything I do.
 You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.

Friday, January 20, 2017

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Journal Entry # 17: Okay Lord, What is Next?

Abba, I ask myself what is next for me? Today at church I am reminded that I need to trust in You. I do not need to know every detail of my future; the why, when, how, or what, I just need to trust You, but I am struggling. I am getting closer to graduating. A lot has happened this semester that did not go the way I expected. I ask that You encourage me about the future. Abba direct my steps as You may. Help me to live in the now and to let tomorrow worry about itself. You will carry me through this life. 
9/26/2010

I am a control freak. I want to know everything that will happen before it happens. For some reason, I do not like to be surprised. I am learning to take one day at a time. It is God who will direct my steps.  I rest knowing that I do not need to know everything. This is a journey. I take comfort in knowing that before I was born, God knew everything. He is involved in every detail of my life. This morning I was encouraged by Psalms 32:8 "The Lord says, I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you. I had to keep saying this verse over and over again. There are those moments when I tend to get nervous about what will happen next for me but I am learning to use God's word. I need His truth.




Monday, January 16, 2017

Journal Entry #16 Why Do I Doubt You Lord?

Why is it that after seeing all we know to be true about You, we still doubt? Abba, please forgive me because I have seen your faithfulness time after time and still doubt you. Please help me to take you at your word. I have no reason to doubt You.
9/9/10

Time after time I have seen God's faithfulness in my life. His Word is true. He is not a man that he should lie. I can not compare man to God. He will never be distrusting the way people have shown themselves to be in my life. I am amazed that, at the right time he always showed Himself faithful and trusting. Through my job search, apartment search, being in school and even my finances, my God is faithful. I know I can depend on Him. 



Question:

Why do you think that you might doubt God?

What do you do to remind yourself of God's faithfulness?

Friday, December 23, 2016

Journal Entry #15 Lord, Stand in the Place of my Dad...

Abba Father, as You know I wrote a letter to my dad and I can't lie I miss him. I wish I had more time with him. I wonder what he could have taught me? I wonder if he would give me away when I'm married? I wonder who would protect me? Protect me from guys? This night I'm hurt as I think about him. I know that You are my Father and I pray that You would stand in the place of my father. Please teach me as a father would teach his daughter.


4/4/10


I really struggled with the death of my dad. I was eight years old when he died of cancer.  I thought about him a lot. I would wonder who would teach me lessons about life or teach me how men are to treat me? I wonder who would protect me? But, I am glad to look to God as my Father. God has been my protector, provider, my friend, my strength, my resting place.

Father...

Provider
Matt. 6:26
Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

Comforter
 2 Corinthians 1:3-4  
All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.  He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.

Loves Us
 John 16:27
for the Father himself loves you dearly because you love me and believe that I came from God.[a]
1 John 3:1
See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him.

Compassionate
Psalm 103:13
The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him.

Corrects Us
Hebrew 12:6
For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.”

Guides Us
Proverbs 3:6

Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Thursday, September 01, 2016

Journal Entry #14 - Free me up, from the Fear of Rejection

Abba I pray for peace in my heart and mind. I no longer want to believe in the lies that I am worthless, ugly, and slow. I need (want) you to remind me of who I am in you. When I look at my past I see a girl that has been hurt. A girl that was lonely and invisible. Show me Your love for me. Show me that I belong to you
 3.10.2010


The pain from being rejected still haunts me. My mind is filled with memories of being rejected. There were many times I was called ugly, monkey, slow, made fun of because of my weight and height, I notice that sometimes I would isolate myself from others because I was afraid of being rejected by my peers. What others thought of me, consumed me. I placed more value on what others have said and thought about me then what God says about me, as his child. The Lord has shown me His love and everyday I am learning to lay down the fear of rejection.

Scriptures:

1 Peter 2:9

But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.

Ephesians 1:3-8

All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son.[a] He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding.

Quotes:

"Rejection isn't just an emotion we feel. It's a message that's sent to the core of who we are, causing us to believe lies about ourselves, others and God. -Uninvited by Lysa TerKeurst



What would you say that you fear and why?